a steaming cup of green tea and a comfy chair

lets get down 2 business. whew ok email advisor and instructor to hear their thoughts about my situation. gonna take a hot shower maybe do a bit of gaming and then go to the library and return my massive amount of bookage. ehehe. last day of work tommrow, its an unknown group of people working tommorow most likely the funky bunch: cannoli, suey, nittta, mmm driana, and muah. i've learned that in order to get things done in my mixed up turbulent mind I gotta do them all and then relax and let the information settle. take one thing at a time, and things will work out, not just blah and huh? all the time, just my first time. next week gonna do trial run of train to bus to school, then maybe go back the easier way hopefully tickets will be sold and I can get my butt back home. i didn't know my counselour grew up in the area im going to future school in. eh so shes fine, and she made it out a talk person yeah gonna bail and take out the trash, love ya babes!

 

boy you just a stupid bitch and gurl ur just a no good dick

omg i have summerfied and surfied my ipod, lets hope the tunes carry me onto the wavelengths of joy and happiness. I found out i have to work on the first of jan uggggh why didnt i put dec 31, oh well get to see my ladies b4 i leave 4 evers. and maybe cannoli, hes a slow one, i think he finally gets the finallity of me leaving, he was all up in my bidnezz talking about fun fun activities, i was like are we totes gonna do that 2gether cuz you are asking me about it. hahaha oh snap. he still has a girlfriend i presume. oldie is not a dick anymore atleast to me. he even says hi before i do, hehehehe. if he wasnt a dick i prob think hes a real cutie pie mcgee. yeah i am all listening to yyy's getting my fembot on. and i'm about to collapse into a heap of sleepiness. so goodnight my buttered almonds. may your moods not control your day and you have lots of positive things to think about. love me

goodbye work i hardly knew ye

ohhhh lalalalalala drums are emo wrapped in a soft fluffy coat that warms my heart and soothes the mind as of now. so far half the crew knows i'm leaving and hales left before me, i swear i was gonna be before her. my mind is full of summer filled romances and whatever niceness summer brings. so far want to remove as much generates as possible and fill it will lovely dovey stuff of yesteryear when i had the strength of a thousand weiderbeasts. too many things fill me with woe, i gotta fix that with new music and stuff like that. alright good day lovlies gonna get ready for work.

may your days be filled with froclicking dance moves, and sweet ass magaritas.

look at that percussionist going at it. it brings a happy smile to my face

Ah man

My buddy Travis is apparently gay... And my anxiety is totally out of Carl like I can't think of anything about the negs or I go bananas stir crazy. Back to travel he has only a couple  of friends and that makes me sooo happy, like he is like me yay. Watched magic in moonlight and that lightened my bad horrible no good anxious thoughts thnx Colin firth my English princes just gotta occupyy my mind with as much happy making heavy distracting things as possible. Like non stop baby. I'm sure that will do the trick and layoff mind over mood book. That is super negatory in the life of happiness.jayson was bein supes gracious for me being so antsy it was nice, I wish I could go on this huge spiel about my worries and then laugh about it,but I don't think we can go there yet. Sometimes I wish I told ready iwas hella depressed, I just thought he would fucking drop me like a sack of potatoes. All day I felt like crying, or stabbing a imaginary being and them losing there life force. Yeah.... Super violent in thinking. When I first had my taste of disappointment I had these anxious thoughts, I don't know if they were purely anxiety. I just now it took hella months and a little bit of crying to get the fuck out of there. I hugged all the aspires and Jim gave like the best hug ever, big warm bear hug maybe that's why Janet is still together with him...I need to sleep but I also need to put my thoughts down or I'llnot be feeling very good when sleeping sondre is almost wreaking its force of music but I still havehope. Ugggg just want to get well faster. GTFO out of my funk and go to school and be alive, pat lived close to school sooo it must have not been to bad. My nerves are killing my chill mode of being. Yeah I also feel like sleeping forever and not waking up. Or have a vacation of me not doing work for a week. Maybe I should just quit. Bye Travvy bye cannoli and my most fave bye big booty you were close yet so far, we'll always be together in dreams. Ok now I feel better cuz the mention of big booty srsly he's like a miracle drug. No I'm not waking up this sat u know why? I'm quitting in a week so it won't even fucking matter anymore, it's just two fucking goddamn hours. Rant down smiles achieved. Now for oatmeal and some mouth rinsing. Hope the love bug bites you all y'all are special elves. Hehehehe

who feels like crap

i do, and my comp is feeling the burn. i've decided to delete my favorite browser in order to get things back to shape. hopefully it works. i feel way anxious again, my mother says i'll be fine in due time. i wish i had more friends i could cry to. i feel defeated again, i was doing so well too, i dont know why i suddenly feel like things are crumbling and i'm not safe and sound. maybe its the dark weather and the rain. im on some anxiety meds and hopefully that helps soothe my inner demons. im trying to get shehim back on poddy but my right clicker is in cahoots recently. yeah... some days are dark, darker then most. i feel like someone tipped me over and i'm hanging on a ledge of emotions. jayson i wished we were even closer, i've told you things that i haven't told anyone. that makes me feel closer to you. i wish there was a get better fast card, but oh ive been feeling is depression and loss of control of anxiety. i can fake it, but i donno. i think if i continue to take the pills i'll be fine. just i see. :) smiles everywhere. i'm go get a good nights sleep too. love you! and cheers.